a place 4 my words ღ✉ღ(。ᴖ_ᴖ。)♪⋆*⋆✩
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wednesday august 23, 2023
listening to: roller coaster by nmixx
drinking: tart cherry juice
mood: busy
the all day music inner thoughts

recently I have been rewatching hamtaro, one of my childhood faves...I love all the various expressions of the hamhams they way they are drawn and animated.. they fill me with joy

this past month I started painting a lot with like..actual paints and brushes. it was really hard to step away from the computer and pick up something physical but lately I feel like I had lost some creative spark so it was nice to just. paint a piece of old wood
it was an old jewelry box I had as a child that had faded over time so I thought i'd make it my own...I'm planning to glue some glass tiles to it later and make it a disco (ball) box !!!!
I also painted on an old sweater vest I had and it's recieved lots of compliments which ngl i'm kinda happy about hehe...i'm definitely planning on doing more I have like 5 ideas but I gotta buy more paint lolz x_x
i'm a little bit tired of summer already orz...unrelated but i've been getting sick a lot and idk why...pray 4 me lol
sunday august 27, 2023
listening to: fez - neil & iraiza
drinking: unsweet watermelon mint black tea
mood: ok
I just want to remind myself to get a grip

here is some prose that is one of my's from shovel2 on tumblr (now deactivated):
I wanted to archive it here because I really luv it

my mid summer day dream:
zzzz....... I will actually draw something.......... zzzzzzz...........
thursday august 31, 2023
mood: bittersweet
I was thinking a lot about the cn real block of cartoon network.... it wuz strange right?.....but in a way I kind of loved it......
cn indeed did have a lot of cartoons, obviously, that were awesome and influential and fun and funny but the stuff on cn real just feels like hidden treasures now even if they (well some of them) sucked LOL..
but then my mind drifted through the years and I got to thinking too hard about how I feel like between then and now I haven't made much life progress in general...even though I know that's not necesarily tru I just can't help but to think about all the things I want to do differently....
but I guess ruminating in it too much won't do me any good so I should just think about growing in the here and now

in other news it's fucking HOT!!!!! it's been unbelieveably hot all summer.(highs 100f+/37c+)'s no fun T_T brb while I go melt....
tuesday september 5, 2023
listening to: moon by perfume
mood: whimsical

today was a fun day hooray..!
I went to the mall to get houseki no kuni volume 12... I can't believe it's coming to an end soon the latest chapter made me cry lol. i've talked about this before but phos will always be near and dear to my heart pleeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaase ichikawa sensei please give them the happy ending they deserve !!!!

I also bought some more night cream from sephora (their in house + good) and an "aurora" eyeshadow from daiso I love it a's sheer pink with blue shift..lovely
I got complimented again on my painted vest it made me really happyyy!!!!!!!!!
for the rest of the nite...I will start umineko chapter 2....
friday september 8, 2023
listening to: zoundtracks by towa tei
eating: pasta with curry sauce
mood: flustered

earlier I was thinking about what to dress up as for halloween even though it's still over a month away.....vampires are pretty timeless so that's an option but i'm thinkin like an alucard castlevania kinda look.....or the prince of all cosmos of katamari that would be fun
I got time to decide tho I suppose

I tend to get so excited for the fall to winter season when the calendar hits september because it's just my fave time of the year....even tho the weather won't let up ~_____~'''' and this summer kinda sucked because I was sick for half of it (which i'm STILL trying to recover from)....

I finished jujutsu kaisen season 1 today and I now have satoru gojo brainrot
saturday september 9, 2023
listening to: b.v.m. - yes,mama ok?
drinking: cherry spritzer
mood: creative

last night before bed I got kind of obsessed with watching cocktail/mocktail making videos they just look so yum.....there's so many combos....for all seasons
so today I made a couple with whatever I had on hand hehe
in the morning I mixed together some mixed fruit juice, orange juice, and lime juice, then muddled some fresh rosemary, ginger, and honey...then shaken and strained and it was super yum really nice combo for the morning hours
I picked up some more cherry juice when I went to the store bc I Had to make this one I saw on instagram it was cherry juice, lime, ginger, rosemary, mint, honey, and cinnamon topped with sparkling water....guys it was incredible............def somethin nice to wind down with
one day i'll find a nice spirit and make something with that as a lil treat....
tuesday september 12, 2023
listening to: elastic girl - kahimi karie
mood: tired

I have been playing a lot of splatoon3
and finally finishing up my webpage...

yestrday I bought two books: tokyo street style by yoko yagi and style on the street by rei shito; i'm super excited to get into them both I love love love reading about people's relationships to fashion and really value the culture of diy and using what you have to build countless outfits, and getting pieces that will last over just buying to buy and following "trends" (that can last for as little as a week!!!!!!wtf!!!!!!!!)
I did use to have that problem... i'm trying to grow out of it and think "in how many ways can I use this? will it be something that can evolve with me?" before buying an article of clothing. it's helped a lot.
until it comes to CDs and music and then I just act like a feral animal LOL

anyways today finally felt like fall!!.......for like 30 minutes and then it got hot again lol.....fatigue really hit me hard afterwords

i'm gonna make some tea and relax for a moment..but then I got some more diy to do hehe
friday september 15, 2023
listening to: the radio
mood: crummy

it seems like no matter what I do I am cursed with the "better than me" mindset.........
"they are more focused"
"this is better than what I can do"
"i'll never be this good"
"i'll never make it this far"
does anxiety come from within or does it come from the outside? something I think about
sunday september 17, 2023
listening to: brilliant smile - switch
mood: sweet

currently re-dyeing the blue in my hair
it's a beautiful color but it requires a lot of maintenance
but that's okay, because like I said........ it is beautiful

I have 1110000000000001 ideas for things I want to draw but I feel like I am not fast enough to get them all out there in a timely manner.
I know that's not necessarily always better like I know taking your time is key but unfortunatly I have this weird feeling I will be abandonded by everybody if I don't keep up.........

besides that I actually felt pretty happy today...just a lightness in my heart that made me feel like smiling
no real reason for it but i'll take it

anyways i'm pretty tired so after I wash this dye out i'm gonna.....start the jujutsu kaisen manga........i'm hooked I need MORE.........